Money & Inheritance·
HIDDEN GRANDCHILDREN'S FUNDS
Two grandparents secretly stash a comfortable sum for each grandchild, sparking tension when the children's father learns of the hidden funds and demands equal access.
Should they have told him from the start?
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The money was meant only for two grandchildren, and their father still didn't know it existed.
Years after the poster's daughter died young, her children's father remarried and built a blended family. The poster and her husband knew their daughter had left behind a small trust for the grandchildren's future, but it was not much. So they decided to add something of their own: a "very comfortable amount," held back for each grandchild to receive at 18.
"This was to help with college, or pay for a house, or to allow them the ability to train for their dream careers," the poster wrote.
But there was one detail they kept to themselves. "We never told our son in-law," the poster said. "This was done so we would not be asked to split the money between all the children and so our grandchildren would not be prioritized less by their father or his wife."
So the money stayed quiet in the background for years.
The oldest grandchild graduated two years ago and got access to the funds. She never mentioned it to her dad.
Then the youngest grandchild graduated this year, opened a high-interest savings account, and chose not to go to college right away. Instead, they planned to pursue a different career path. That decision changed everything.
Once the savings came up, the father learned the money had been there all along.
According to the poster, "My son in-law's wife was furious" that nobody had told them years earlier. The father said he was hurt that the poster and her husband had chosen not to give something to all the children. He said "he had hoped we would want all the children to have the same start in their adult lives."
He also said they should have told him so "he and his wife could plan accordingly."
The conflict spread quickly through the family. The youngest grandchild moved in with the poster and husband after it started. Both grandchildren have since spoken with their father several times about what happened. But the father is still standing by his complaint.
He still insists the poster and husband should have disclosed the money from the beginning.
The poster ended the account with a simple question: "AITAH?"