DAD CALLS EX NAME

Her father called her husband by her abusive ex's name at the end of the wedding, then walked away like nothing happened.

For months, the 25-year-old bride says the people who should have been helping her plan a January wedding did everything but. She and her 26-year-old fiancé had been together four years and got engaged in February, intending to pay for the whole thing themselves. But her parents insisted on contributing, she said, because they had paid for the weddings of her two older siblings.

Instead, the support came with a constant stream of insults.

Her mother started early, making body-shaming remarks about the dress and the planning. One comment, the bride said, landed especially hard: "you need to start walking and eat more salads to lose some weight before you can't fit in any wedding dresses." It hit a nerve because she already walked 25,000 to 30,000 steps a day at work, ate salads for lunch, and had a history of insecurity and eating disorders.

Then came the venue lunch.

According to the bride, her parents sat down and immediately started criticizing everything, too big, too expensive, too extra. Her father added, "already spent so much to help me out," and pulled out a literal receipt listing what he had paid for over the years: schooling, college, a car, and help with a trailer. In the middle of the argument, he also called her fiancé by the name of her ex, the abusive, manipulative ex she had been trying to leave behind.

Her mother kept going. At another point, she asked, "how many of those coworkers are black?" and later put it more bluntly: "how many of them are black, because if we're gonna be paying for all this we don't really want all those people there, around us and eating the food we payed for."

The parents' behavior got so bad that they contacted the venue themselves, trying to talk about attending a wedding there. Staff worried they might show up and cause a scene, so the venue increased security. The bride told the venue and all the vendors to call her immediately if her parents tried to change anything or interfere, saying she was afraid they could call and get things canceled before the wedding.

Then the wedding arrived.

In an update, she said they were married and the day was perfect, except for the parts involving her parents. Her mother never came to help her get into her dress; instead, her maid of honor's mom stepped in. By the end of the night, her father did it again, calling her husband by the ex's name: "congrats goodbye (exs name)."

She broke down crying. She apologized to her husband. Her maid of honor shouted at her father to come back and apologize. He tried to brush it off: "I don't think I said that. Just excuse my old brain I've been up all day. Idek what I said."

The bride said she doesn't know how to forgive her dad. But she also said the wedding was better than she imagined, and that she felt loved by her husband and friends. "Who needs my parents anyway," she wrote, "I have so many other people who actually love and care about me. And I don't have to question that I just know."