SECRET ON HIS PHONE

A wife caught her husband cheating on his own phone, then sat on the secret until he confessed first.

A week and a half ago, she was using his phone to order something on Amazon when a notification popped up from an unknown number. She clicked it, and instead of a harmless message, she found months of flirty texts, inappropriate pictures, and exchanges where another woman asked him to come to her apartment a few times. Her reaction was immediate: he was a cheater, obviously, and she says she decided she could not stay with him.

But she did not confront him right away.

The reason, she says, was not confusion about what she found. It was the mess waiting behind it. The couple has three kids together, a 5-year-old, a 1-year-old, and a 2-month-old. They also signed a prenup because, as she put it, "we signed a prenup bc he had some money he wanted to protect." That agreement came with another complication: "the prenup had a clause where it's dissolved if he's unfaithful."

Then came the custody worry. She says, "I was scared that a judge would give him custody bc he can afford to take care of them better." So she kept quiet, telling herself she was not going to do anything "crazy" and only wanted to find a lawyer before saying a word.

She never got the chance.

Before she confronted him, he came to her and told her about the cheating himself. He apologized. And when he expected a confession from her, she cut in with the truth of her own: "I told him I knew about it already."

That did not go over well.

According to the wife, he got angry that she had not said anything sooner and accused her of "ruining our family by keeping secrets from him." Her response to that was blunt: "Like okay hypocrite much?"

Now she is stuck on the part that comes after the confession. She says she still wants her kids to "grow up normal" and does not want "a broken home" for them. She is asking whether the fact that he admitted it and apologized changes anything. Could they still make it work? Or should she still go through with a divorce anyway?

Her final question is the one she put to the internet: "AITAH for not telling him I knew sooner? WIBTAH if I still divorce him after he told me about it?"